BDSM Love & Relationships with Dr. Charley Ferrer

>> Thursday, July 07, 2011

I'd like to welcome our special guest Dr. Charley Ferrer. 


Dr. Charley Ferrer is a world renowned Clinical Sexologist, Talk Show Host, and award winning author. She has appeared on numerous radio and television and is a freelance writer for various newspapers and magazines. She lectures on relationships and sexual health throughout the United States and Latin America.


We have extra-special giveaways today. Comment to enter.  Details below.

BDSM Love & Relationships

By

Dr. Charley Ferrer

I’ve been a Clinical Sexologist and Relationship Mentor for over 15 years. I’ve written six other books on sexuality and self-empowerment, even won the award for Best Self-Help Book 2002 with my first book, The W.I.S.E. Journal for the Sensual Woman. My book, The Latina Kama Sutra, was nominated for best sexuality book in 2008. And though I’m beyond proud of all my books, I’m especially thrilled about my two new books BDSM FOR WRITERS and BDSM THE NAKED TRUTH.

It’s my hope that with these two new books on Dominance and submission, I can pull back the leather curtain and show you the truth behind this uniquely erotic and often misunderstand lifestyle. BDSM THE NAKED TRUTH will assist you, the reader, to better understand the men and women who identify within this unique mindset and dispel many of the misconceptions the media and Hollywood have erroneously portrayed in order to sensationalize the audience and make money. It’s my desire to shed some like into the dark abyss and show you that the men and women who participate in Power Exchange relationships are not weird, perverted, nor mentally unstable though their desires do not conform to the norm. Please note I stated “norm” not normal. BDSM IS A NORMAL expression of an individual’s sexual and sensual desires; however it is not a common.

I’m often asked if BDSM is about one person hurting another. The answer to that is NO! The major difference between BDSM and domestic violence is that when the submissive (receiver) asks the Dominant (giver) to stop—the Dominant stops! In a domestic violence situation, the abuser does not stop. Often there is anger and hatred behind domestic violence. In a power exchange relationship, there is no malice. The individuals are not trying to hurt nor injury each other; they merely wish to share a sacred part of themselves with another. And yes, their interactions may look different than your typical relationships however when you stop and think about it, we all express our love and affection in a different ways.

Though they resemble their vanilla cousins to a large extent, Dominance and submission relationships differ greatly based not only because of the Power Exchange dynamics involved but based on the level of open communication and the willingness of each individual to open themselves up to their partner. This amazing mixture of communication, acceptance, affection, exploration and vulnerability are the foundation of every healthy and long lasting BDSM relationship.

The most amazing essence of a Dominance and submission relationship isn’t the erotic thrills or the “whips and chains” as most would believe—it’s the communication. Dominants and submissives in a relationship speak about everything! Whereas most men and women entering into a vanilla relationship withhold information about their desires and sexual needs because they fear rejection or ridicule, in a Power Exchange relationship, the individual’s most embarrassing desires, their fears of abandonment, their fears of failure and never being good enough, their need for love and most importantly what these issues look like are immediately addressed or noted for further discussions. Granted the submissive typically reveals more of him or herself than the Dominant in this respect because let’s face it who wants a wimpy Dominant. However it is through these revelations, this baring of the soul by both partners, and the realistic declaration of their desires and what they’re willing to give and accept from each other that is the foundation of this unique relationship.

This doesn’t mean that the submissive or the Dominant won’t decide somewhere along the line that this relationship isn’t for them. Nor that fears won’t sometimes crop up and create obstacles. Yet because of their willingness to be honest about their needs and desires—in essence bare their soul and psyche to their partner—this openness will ensure these couples reach a level of intimacy and emotional connection unparalleled by their conventional vanilla cousins. And I dare say, they will reach it faster.

The fact that these emotional and psychologically intense topics are open for discussion within a few months if not at the commencement of their union, makes these relationships more realistic and emotionally stable than the typical conventional relationship where men and women hide behind a façade then wonder why things went wrong six months or two years or god forbid twenty years down the road and/or someone is cheating in order to get their sexual desires met.

I’m not saying that Power Exchange relationships are the best. What I am saying is, wouldn’t it be wonderful if you could be completely open with your partner and not have to hide any aspects of yourself; to know that you’re accepted completely despite your flaws or unconventional, erotic, and/or sexual desires. (Excerpt from BDSM THE NAKED TRUTH)

I have to chuckle when I think about how we all strive to be the best in what we do. We take workshops to find ourselves, go to college to learn to be better in our careers, play endless hours of video games or sports to “be the best”. And yet, the one aspect in our lives that will be with us forever—our sexuality—we quickly close our eyes to hoping that we’ll get it right some day.

It’s my greatest wish that BDSM THE NAKED TRUTH will open the door to a path of self discovery for you that allows you to embrace your wild adventurous side. And though you need not go to the extremes, you can dip your toes in this pond and take what you want from it. However if you find you don’t like it nor want to try, at least you can be confident in the fact that you’re making an informed decision instead of one based on ignorance or bias.


For authors, BDSM FOR WRITERS provides you with the necessary information required to understand this unique lifestyle and be able to create characters which convey the true aspects of Dominance and submission. My book not only provides you with the basics but more importantly it helps you understand the psychology and the emotional connection men and women make in this lifestyle. Without that understanding, your D/s characters lack integrity and I dare say—credibility.

I want to thank you all for taking the time to stop by and leave your questions and comments. I also want to thank Joan for her kindness in creating those beautiful bookmarks and having me on her Blog to speak to you about my books. Please reserve your copy today at www.bdsmforwriters.com and enter to win over 30 wonderful kinky prizes and one mundane one. Plus if you leave a message or comment today, you’ll be entered to win.

Live with passion,
Dr. Charley Ferrer



Dr. Charley has given us an extra special prize to giveaway:
A set of hand made metal shackles, compliments of Dungeon Delights
and worth $79-$99 !!!

Other prizes:~ A copy of Dr. Charley's book - winner's choice
~ 1 of 5 handmade bookmarks, pictured above
Ways to enter:
1 point for blog comment here

1 point for Tweeting:
@DoctorCharley author of #BDSM for #Writers talking #Relationships w #GIVEAWAY of shackles, book, bookmarks! http://bit.ly/o8xEuO #drcharley

1 point for liking Dr. Charley's Facebook page:

Contest closes 7/13, midnight pacific time.
Winners chosen, announced, and contacted via email 7/14

** MUST leave a contact email to WIN **

58 comments:

Sherry Isaac 6:59 AM  

Dr. Ferrer;

What an intriguing way to look at the relationship of give and take. How much we choose what to reveal, or not reveal, to a partner, a friend, peer or co-worker, is based on trust. When trust is eroded (oh, those flawed heroines!) at the high school prom, on the playground, or even in the playpen, adult relationships are affected. We learn to be very selective about how much we reveal, we learn to lie to protect our vulnerabilities.

I don't see myself using dominance & submission per se in a novel, and probably not in real life (although I've been tempted to hit my husband over the head with a frying pan - but that's not what you're selling, LOL!) but your post has given me insights into my character arcs and plots that I've never seen before. And it has made me think of the role of trust in real life. No, I won't reach for the frying pan...

Amy 7:54 AM  

Dear Dr. C:

I love reading your articles (and blog and books and everything else that you write) because you manage to articulate the inner workings of the Dom/sub relationship with accessibility and warmth. Your words resound with me, and I'm deeply appreciative. Thank you. From an author standpoint, most days I feel writing BDSM relationships are way more difficult than actually dealing with a real-life Dom. (ha!)

Marie Tuhart 8:15 AM  

Hi Dr. Charley,

Great post and I love reading about the BDSM world. I'm anxiously waiting for your books to come out. As a author I need to understand more about the BDSM world so my characters act in a realistic manner.

Marie Tuhart 8:17 AM  

Opps forgot to leave my contact info:
marietuhart@yahoo.com

Queen of English 10:30 AM  

I am another eagerly awaiting your book for authors to come out. I have three characters in my head whom I adore and I want to do right by them.
Thank you for making this topic more accessible to everyone.

MM the Queen of English
queenofenglish@live.com

Dr. Charley Ferrer 11:08 AM  

Sherry,

Yeap, I'd save the frying pan for cooking. *chuckles*

As you can see, D/s isn't just about the toys but so much more and these very same aspects are in all relationships to varying degrees--at least they should be. Am pleased to hear my words inspire. Look forward to reading that new story.

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley...

Dr. Charley Ferrer 11:26 AM  

Amy,

Thank you for your kind words that’s so sweet of you to say.

I hope you’ll be joining me for the BDSM FOR WRITERS workshops I’m conducting at Savvy Authors starting August 15. Here’s the link for the Basics class. (Plus you don't have to be an author to take the class.)

http://www.savvyauthors.com/vb/showevent.php?eventid=1089

And though some may already know the Basics, this class opens so many more doors then merely knowing terminology. We will look at the emotional and psychological connections as well. Something most books don’t address. It’s easy to throw a Whip into a story to achieve word counts; however if you don’t know “WHY” the person craves the feel of the Whip against their flesh or “WHY” it provides a sense of “Peace” to the Dominant yielding it, taking their submissive to a higher level of connection…well as you know, it’s really not a D/s story.

Personally, I’d rather deal with the Dom then try to create a story. That’s just scary! *smiles* So glad you do it with ease.

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley…

Dr. Charley Ferrer 11:36 AM  

Hi Marie,

Hugs. So pleased to see you here. My book will be out in early August. It’s currently with the editor, Casey Lynn Media & Marketing Services, being finalized. Soon I’ll be jumping up and down with joy and sending it to you.

I’m thrilled to hear your comment about wanting to get more education about BDSM to make your characters more realistic. It’s authors like you that make it a pleasure to read books as I know when I read one of your fabulous stories, I’ll be well informed and the characters will be a respectful and accurate portrayal of this uniquely erotic lifestyle.

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley…

Dr. Charley Ferrer 11:52 AM  

Hello your Majesty, *smiles*

I’m so pleased to see you here. Can’t wait to learn about your characters and read their story.

Will you also be at the workshops with Savvy Authors? It’s a three part series (Basics, Advance, and Character/Scene Analysis); though you don’t have to take all three. I’m doing a combination Chat—Webinar with power point presentation so it’s not merely basics you’re learning but lots of great tricks used by individuals actually in the Lifestyle as well.

You may really like Part III as it allows authors to submit up to 5-pages of a Character/Scene and we’ll tweak it if necessary for maximum results. Plus, I’d love to be introduced to your characters as well.
*smiles*

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley…

Dr. Charley Ferrer 12:10 PM  

Hi all,

For everyone that is not an author, my book BDSM THE NAKED TRUTH is just for you!

It provides some of the same information on the dynamics of BDSM and Power Exchange relationships which the authors’ book BDSM FOR WRITERS has; however, BDSM THE NAKED TRUTH focuses on the relationship and even has a special "relationship's chapter” just for you!

It’s my hope that as you read either BDSM THE NAKED TRUTH or BDSM FOR WRITERS you’ll discover that this unique lifestyle is more than what you’re been lead to believe and is full of individuals just like yourself who want to share a respectful and intensely intimate and sometimes physical relationship.

Plus if you read my books, you’ll learn that most of us are already practicing or have participated in some form of power exchange relationship—we just called it something else.

I look forward to hearing from all of you once you’ve read either BDSM THE NAKED TRUTH or BDSM FOR WRITERS to learn what you think. As for all the secrets you’ll discover within the pages…ssshhhhhh...we’ll just keep that between us. *smiles*

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley…

StacieDM,  12:25 PM  

Hello Dr Charley!
I think it's great that you have been able to help writers create BDSM stories that are based on fact instead of myth. I am a reader of BDSM romance and I am fascinated by the complexity of emotions and motivation of characters in BDSM stories. Everything I know about BDSM I learned from fiction so I would be interested to see how the stories I've read compare to your book The Naked Truth. Thanks for stopping by today!

User1123 AT comcast DOT net

StacieDM,  12:32 PM  

I retweeted the giveaway link with hashtags. My twitter name is GeishasMom73

User1123 AT comcast DOT net

Teri Anne Stanley 12:33 PM  

Wow, this is an awesome post! Such an interesting topic--at least to read about--that whole honesty thing scares the living hoo hoo out of me way more than a spanking!
Teri Anne Stanley
Teriannestanley@gmail.com

Dr. Charley Ferrer 1:54 PM  

Hi StacieDM:

Thank you for stopping by and putting the word out. I look forward to receiving your feedback on my book, BDSM THE NAKED TRUTH. *smiles*

I’m always looking for new BDSM authors to read and would love to get your input. My #1 favorite BDSM author is Joey W. Hill who incidentally was the catalyst to these books. She’s even graciously written the Preface for BDSM FOR WRITERS.

Live with passion,

Dr. Charley Ferrer

Dr. Charley Ferrer 1:59 PM  

Note to self: never drink juice while reading Teri Anne’s comments. *chuckles*

Thanks for the compliment!

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley...

Dr. Charley Ferrer 2:04 PM  

By the way, aren’t the bookmarks awesome!

Can you believe Joan made them herself? She’s not only a brilliant author but a craft designer as well. And the bookmarks even have their own cuffs. How cute is that?

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley...

Janyce Hill,  3:32 PM  

(I'm not sure if my first post came through - so apologies if this appears twice.)

As someone who lives in a service submissive/bottom relationship with a Dom/top for the past six years, I have a great appreciation for those writers who make an attempt to "Get it right". I'm sure your book will be a great asset to writers who want to incorporate the heart of BDSM, and not just the surface into their works.

As power exchange relationships have gone more and more mainstream in the past few years, it has been interesting to watch the explosion of fiction (i.e. romance) books featuring BDSM relationships at their core.

And for those of us (a very large, but mostly silent majority) it is also very clear when a writer has spent the time and energy to understand the nature of BDSM - and when they've just thrown in some whips and chains to spice up a section.

I would strongly recommend everyone who wants to write about power exchange relationships from a truly centered place - to also read Jake Rinella's book Partners in Power - to fully understand how BDSM relationships can exist in many different forms.

Thanks for adding to the body of knowledge about our lifestyle.

Regards
Janyce Hill
gamemaven@gmail.com

Tanya1224 6:43 PM  

Thanks for the post. I've been reading books lately that have had BDSM in them. It was a shock at first but I'm starting to like it now that I know more about it =) I'd love a chance to win some of these awesome goodies. I know my husband will enjoy it too ;) Shackles...very nice!
+1 comment
+1 tweeted at http://twitter.com/#!/Tanya1224/status/89146380219715584
Tanyaw1224(at)yahoo(dot)com

Dr. Charley Ferrer 6:48 PM  

Hi Janyce,

Thank you for your post and for the information on Jake Rinella’s book. I figure the more books someone reads on a topic, the better they’ll understand and be able to see similar and/or distinct viewpoints. I have two entire bookshelves dedicated to only BDSM books.

Given your experience, I look forward to hearing what you have to say about my book: BDSM THE NAKED TRUTH. My books will be out in August.

Plus, if you Reserve your copy now you’ll receive a $500 Digital Erotic Art from Captured Erotic and entered to win: a set of steel shackles from Dungeon Delights; a handmade Single Tail Whip from Quality Whips; books on bondage from Hunter House; three mini Floggers from My Lady’s Toys, plus much more. Ok, that may have been a shameless promotion (smiles innocently) but I do so love giving away all these gifts—I’ve collected 26 prizes so far including a Kindle thought it's not kinky I think it’s still good, right? Now if I can just convince Victor to make TWO Whips. *chuckles*

And lest I forget, Joan has graciously made bookmarks which someone will win this week. Yahoo!

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley…

Dr. Charley Ferrer 6:57 PM  

Tanya,

Thanks for helping to get the word out. Joan will pick the winners for this week; however, remember you can also be entered to win one of the 26 Prizes available with a book purchase.

And for those writers that sign up for the BDSM FOR WRITERS workshops with Savvy Authors that I’m conducting start August 15th, you’ll also be entered to win Shackles and/or other gifts.

Ok, did I mention I love giveaways! I feel like Santa Claus only not as hairy.

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley…

Stephanie Christine,  8:05 PM  

I love love the bookmark!! I can't wait for your books to come out they are going to be so wonderful to read! Thanks for the contest

Stephanie Christine/Chibiboo

sprite4627 AT yahoo DOT com

Shelley Munro 8:13 PM  

Thanks for the interesting post, Doctor Charley. I have to admit, although this area fascinates me, I've steered clear of writing a BDSM story because I didn't want to get it wrong. I look forward to your books, and I'm off to check out your class.

shelleymunroATgmailDOTcom

PamelaTurner 9:04 PM  

Thanks for giving an informative account of what BDSM is. I've become interested in writing about it but want to make sure I understand the intricacies of such relationships before I attempt a story. One thing I hate is reading BDSM by someone who uses it purely for sensationalism and gets it wrong on top of that.

Will definitely have to take the class & get the book. Marking calendar... :-)

plturner2 at insightbb dot com

Dr. Charley Ferrer 9:49 PM  

Hi Stephanie:

I totally agree. I love the bookmarks!!!

They’re Joan’s creations and they’re spectacular. I especially love the little handcuffs. *chuckles*

I look forward to hearing your thoughts on the books.

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley…

Dr. Charley Ferrer 10:37 PM  

Pamela,

I couldn’t agree with you more!

I look forward to having you in my upcoming BDSM FOR WRITERS class in August where you’ll have more chances to win prizes. Maybe, I can bribe Joan into making more bookmarks by then. *smiles*

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley…

KendallGrey 3:30 AM  

HI, Dr. Charley!

Loved this blog post, and I'm getting really pysched about learning the ins and outs of the power exchange. I'm signed up for the Savvy BDSM class, I've pre-ordered BDSM for Writers, and I'm ready to start planning a new book with a BDSM couple - my first ever. *Bites nails*

I Tweeted your link and liked you on Facebook. Best of luck with both books coming out, and can't wait to host your interview on my blog next week!

HUGS!

Kendall
kendall (at) kendallgrey (dot) com

Pat Marinelli 9:45 AM  

Great explanation here. Intrigues me enough to go look at your Savvy class. Your book sounds like a wonderful tool for my writer’s toolbox.

C.J. 3:22 PM  

My friend who knows I'm new to both BDSM writing and the D/s relationship sent me this link and I'm glad! Your books sound great and those bookmarks are fabulous (as are the handcuffs--my pink velcro ones don't meet with a Dom's approval--lol) Thanks for the clear and insightful words on power exchange relationships. All best, CJ
cjscintilla@gmail.com

Dr. Charley Ferrer 7:18 PM  

Kendall,

HUGS! You're so wonderful. I think for my talk on your Blog next week we should celebrate with Lemonade Margaritas. I'll get the mix and limes/lemons and vodka. And I'll throw in a copy of BDSM FOR WRITERS and BDSM THE NAKED TRUTH. Winner's choice. *smiles* Can't wait. Thanks for joining me here too.

BTW, I have no doubt your first BDSM book will be fantastic! I already love your story INHALE. You're an excellent writer. Besides, you have your own Clinical Sexologist and BDSM Expert to help with the technical stuff. Smiles.

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley...

Dr. Charley Ferrer 7:33 PM  

Pat Marinelli:

Thank you for the compliment.

I think you'll enjoy both the book, BDSM FOR WRITERS, and the class(es) I'm teaching on the topic through Savvy Authors. Even if you don't write in the BDSM genre, it'll provide you with wonderful information about the Lifestyle and help you understand why individuals do what they do. Personally, that rocks my world. Of course, I'm talking about psychology. *smiles*

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley...

Dr. Charley Ferrer 8:07 PM  

Hi CJ,

Welcome to writing D/s and the Lifestyle. My thanks to the friend who referred you to this interview.

I would have to agree with that Dom’s disapproval of Velcro. Nothing beats the primal feel of steel restraints.(No pun intended.) Look at it this way, a mischievously clever slave can use their teeth to get out of Velcro; however, he/she will still be there in the morning with steel handcuffs or shackles. Not to mention the psychological grip that steel induces on the subconscious is phenomenal.

As you know, we’re giving away a set of steel Shackles graciously provided by Dungeon Delights. (Points to the picture above).
Aren’t they beautiful?!!!

I look forward to receiving your comments on my book and the BDSM FOR WRITERS workshops being hosted by Savvy Authors. Plus, you have another chance to win Shackles and cool kinky toys during the workshops as well. I just love toys! I think everyone should have at least 1 or 2 or…well you get the idea.

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley

Lolarific 10:55 PM  

I love the post! I'm glad Dr.Charley is continuing to share her knowledge with the world. I've read some of her other interviews and always find myself agreeing with everything she has to say! Too many people shy away from being truly open with their partner and I always have to shake my head when I witness it.

I ABSOLUTELY LOVE the bookmarks! Awesome job Joan!!

Thank you both for this amazing giveaway!

dani3222001(at)yahoo(dot)com

tweeted as well!

Josie Brown, 10:07 AM  

Wow! Great article! Goes into the psychic, without any of the psycho. I know I'll play with this somehow.

Tweeted up via @JosieBrownCA

And yes, I liked Doctor Charley's FB fan page.

-- Josie

mail@josiebrown.com

KrazieFish,  11:26 AM  

Wonderful as always. Thanks much sharing this, DoctorSexy.

Fish

(I'll DM you my email)

Dr. Charley Ferrer 11:49 AM  

Hi Lolarific,

GMTA! *smiles*

You might enjoy this article I wrote for Fox News Latino (yes, in English) about the Weiner scandal and the real tragedy was that he didn’t communicate his desires with his partner.

http://latino.foxnews.com/latino/health/2011/06/20/learn-from-anthony-weiner-communication-is-key-for-healthy-relationship/

I truly believe if people would communicate not only their desires but their concerns, fears, love, expectations, etc. they’d have such a happy fulfilling life. They wouldn’t need to come see me or other Therapist. (ooh wait, that would put me outta business. Huh..guess I’d be able to retire then. Smiles)

As for the bookmarks, they are AWESOME!!! I’m so pleased Joan made one for me. I already have one of the photographers of the cover begging for his own bookmark.

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley…

Dr. Charley Ferrer 11:57 AM  

Josie:

Smiles. I like the way you put that. Thanks.

BTW love your book title: The Housewife Assassin’s Handbook.

I know several women who might look for hints in your book. I believe Sherry (points up) mentioned a frying pan. *chuckles*

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley…

Dr. Charley Ferrer 12:00 PM  

Hey lil fish,

Thanks for coming by and reading. Tugs on your fins. *smiles*

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley...

Linda McDonald 7:11 PM  

What an interesting blog post. I'll definitely be checking out the bsdm writer's website for more info. I'm really fascinated by what you said about the communication aspect of it. As someone who is not really good at communicating my deepest desires, I think this would be a good topic for me to read up on.

Isabella 8:30 PM  

I really enjoyed reading this; I think it's about time that someone provided an aid for those of us who want to add this dimension to our fiction in an AUTHENTIC manner. Thank you for this!

Isabella
IsabellaLaFelini@gmail.com

Dr. Charley Ferrer 9:50 PM  

Linda,

I look forward to hearing your comments on my website, either www.bdsmforwriters.com or www.bdsmthenakedtruth.com

And of course, you can always visit my non-BDSM website that has information on relationships and sexuality www.instituteofpleasure.org

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley...

Dr. Charley Ferrer 9:54 PM  

Isabella,

Thank you! It's nice to know the information is welcomed.

Hope to see you at one of the BDSM FOR WRITERS workshops hosted by Savvy Authors commencing August 15.

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley...

Raven 10:13 PM  

Hi Doctor Charley,

People always assume by the way that I look that I'm highly into BDSM, but in reality I'm not. Not that I'm against it, but I've never really had the chance to read up on it or find out really anything, so I'm in the grey area. I can't wait to get a hold of the book so I can check it out and hopefully it will finally give me the insight I've been after.
This quote "I’m not saying that Power Exchange relationships are the best. What I am saying is, wouldn't it be wonderful if you could be completely open with your partner and not have to hide any aspects of yourself; to know that you're accepted completely despite your flaws or unconventional, erotic, and/or sexual desires. (Excerpt from BDSM THE NAKED TRUTH)" has greatly raised my interest!
Good job, and it looks like you're raising quite a bit of interest, I've been trying to help as much as I can and I hope it helps. Thank you for writing this book, and also for including me in this wonderfully educational project. Looking forward to hearing from you!

It's Raven..you already have my email but just in case it's Starbl00d@live.com. I followed you on FaceBook (I swear I had liked the page before?), and I tried to repost on Twitter but sadly I don't think I did it right...I'm not very Twitter-saavy lol. I've also been passing the word on my websites and to my other friends.

Linda McDonald 1:00 PM  

Oops, I forgot to leave my contact mail for my post.....it is csolinda at hotmail (dot) (com)

And yes, I'll definitely check out all your websites. Thanks very much!

Dr. Charley Ferrer 7:02 PM  

Linda,

Thanks for returning and providing your email.

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley...

Dr. Charley Ferrer 7:11 PM  

Raven,

You are such a sweetheart. Thank you!

I hope you don’t mind me introducing you. *smiles*

EVERYONE, Raven is responsible for the SPECTACULAR picture of the woman biting the handcuffs on the cover of BDSM FOR WRITERS. I’m so pleased she agreed to allow me to add it to my cover. Isn't it awesome!?!

To find more of her amazing work, go to www.deviantart.com and look up Starblood.

I’m so pleased you enjoyed the quote from the book. Can’t wait to hear your comments (and everyone else’s) once you’ve read it.

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley…

Collins 7:48 PM  

The book for writers sounds intriguing. I can't wait to read it!

Leah Braemel 8:09 PM  

Hi Dr Charley, I am looking forward to reading your BDSM for writers as I plot/write my next book. And thanks for the reminder about the course over on Savvy Writers...I plan to register.

Leah
Leah dot braemel AT gmail Dot com

Lela Gwenn 8:17 PM  

I think that this is a great book and I look forward to getting my hands on it.

Lgwenn AT yahoo dot com

daydrmzzz 11:23 PM  

Thanks so much for the opportunity to win this book along with the other amazing prizes (shackles=shivers) The book sounds amazing, I look forward to reading it.
Following & tweeted.
drmgrl99(at)yahoo(dot)com

Dr. Charley Ferrer 11:47 AM  

Hi everyone,

Thank you all for joining me and leaving your comments or just reading the Blog. I can’t wait to find out who won—the book, the shackles, and the bookmark. Me, I want the bookmark—I just love it. Ok granted, I already have the other two but still—I just love those tiny little handcuffs and the book cover is darling. Now I’ll have to convince Joan to teach me how to do them so I can make hundreds. Well ok, at least two or three more. *chuckles*

Now just because this interview is over doesn’t been the fun stops. Please feel free to join me at www.kendallgrey.com for another interview that’s going on now with more questions and answers. As I’m sure you can tell, every interview is unique.

My special thanks to Joan for allowing me to share this time with you all.

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley…

Laurie London 8:02 PM  

Hi Dr. Charley,

What a wonderfully informative post. I'm not too familiar with BDSM, so this was fascinating, particularly hearing about the emotional aspect. The books sound great. Can't wait to read them.

Love these bookmarks, Joan!!!

Laurie at LaurieLondonBooks dot com

Dr. Charley Ferrer 4:01 PM  

Hi Laurie,

Thanks for stopping by. You just squeezed before the dateline.

I think most people don't realize "whips & chains" are just the icing on the cake for some practitioners of BDSM and many don't ever use them. There are so many ways to express D/s, Baskin & Robin couldn't keep up with the flavors.

BTW love your bookmark as well. You have teeth on yours. *smiles*

Live with passion,

Doctor Charley...

Joan Swan 9:17 PM  

WINNERS Chosen by Random.org:

(I will email you all) Congrats!!

Shackles: Lucky #7 Janyce Hill
Book: #23 daydrmzzz
Bookmarks:
#12 Kendall Grey
#6 Teri Anne Stanley
#16 Josie Brown
#25 Laurie London
#11 Pamela Turner

Janyce Hill,  9:41 PM  

Thanks for this wonderful give away - but more thanks for to Charley for putting together a handbook that is sure to clear up a lot of misconceptions about the lifestyle.

I'm hopping over to the site to pre-order. And would be happy to discuss further with others via direct email my experiences. (gamemaven@gmail.com)

Regards
Janyce Hill

daydrmzzz 9:56 PM  

Thank you so much!! Very excited about the book!!

scarlet reynolds 12:31 AM  

I stumbled upon your blog while searching the internet for free online dating sites. Anyway, it's been nice dropping by your blog.

relationship problems 1:46 AM  

One thing you should never avoid when there are relationship problems is avoiding conflict together. This mostly like to happen to couples who doesn't want confrontations. Rather than discussing building frustrations in a calm, respectful manner, some people just don't say anything to their partner until they're ready to explode, and then blurt it out in an angry, hurtful way leading to ugly and painful breakups.

seo crossing 3:29 AM  

BDSM
Rope Bondage
London Dominatrix

Thanks for sharing and extending our training potential... Keep up the femization and sissification ....

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